How to find the puzzle pieces to build your ‘big picture’ life
updated on Jun 23, 2026
Life coach Kate Kilby makes the case for why you should look for ‘puzzle pieces’ when pursuing goals, and breaks down this handy, practical tool so you can start piecing together a brighter future
Have you ever felt completely lost, craving change but unsure where to begin? It can feel like standing in a dark room, surrounded by unknowns.
You might sense, deep down, that a hidden door is waiting for you, but when you can’t see a way forward, it’s hard to move. The trap is hoping a ‘lightbulb moment’ will rescue you, allowing you to see everything clearly. And the problem isn’t that lightbulbs don’t help, but you risk passively willing the switch to flip on.
In truth, you don’t need to see everything clearly to be able to move forward. In fact, oftentimes the opposite is true, and feeling things out one small step at a time will reveal your path. My invitation to you is this: don’t wait for lightbulbs, look for puzzle pieces.
What does that look like in practice? First, you need to find an image that is meaningful and motivating. This is your puzzle. Start with the theme or genre of your ‘big picture’ (for example, career, relationship, parenting, finances, physical wellbeing), then visualise the overall impression and feeling you want it to evoke. What elements do you see – who, what, where? Is your image exciting, dynamic, bold, and challenging? Or calm, spacious, balanced, simplified?
Then, find your corner pieces; the personal pillars of who you are, and what is most important to you. Your intrinsic core values, your non-negotiables, your passions and talents. Free online resources and assessments can help you identify your core values or strengths, or you could work with a coach and dive deeper into understanding how they show up for you and how to live more in alignment with them.
Next, look for your edge pieces. These are the boundaries that you’re not willing to cross. Distinguish your must-haves and must-nots from your strong preferences. But be mindful: something might look like an edge, but in fact may be an untested assumption, a habit, or someone else’s ‘edge’.
For example, you might want to pivot careers but see a pay cut as an ‘edge’. Define that. What level of pay cut could you sustain, and how long for? 10%, 20%, 30%... More? For six months, one year, two years? You’ll find the edge somewhere, which will show you the space you have to play with.
With your outline framed, you can start finding, testing, and connecting one piece at a time. When you know what to look for, you can cast your eyes with both breadth and focus, helping new ideas to pop out of the jumbled confusion. Pose yourself a question that inspires small and specific ideas that might fit a bigger goal. For example, what can I do in five minutes each day that will help me feel more confident at work? You might decide to read affirmations each morning, buy a book to upskill a gap, or log little wins every day. Or perhaps you’ve been thinking about changing careers but don’t know where to start. You might ask yourself, “What one conversation might help me understand whether I’d enjoy being a florist?” You might text that old friend who’s married to one, walk into your local florist and offer to buy them a coffee in return for a chat, or DM your favourite floral account on Instagram.
The main thing is that you take action. Staring at the pieces spread out on the table will get you nowhere. Pick one up, try it out. Some will fit. Some won’t. Either way, you’ll gain information about what to look for next.
When completing a jigsaw, have you noticed how you gather pace the closer you get to completing the picture? How the overwhelm diminishes, and the excitement builds? There’s satisfaction in finally revealing the full image. But that satisfaction is not only from completion, but also from enjoying the process, and the accumulation of dozens (or hundreds) of micro-wins.
Waiting for lightning to strike, however electrifying or illuminating, doesn’t build overnight confidence or satisfaction. Once the lightbulb has flicked on, you still have to work out how to navigate what you see before you. But the process of intentionally, curiously, consistently sifting through puzzle pieces builds confidence, satisfaction, and a deeper understanding of the picture you’re creating.
